M.Scott Peck a psychiatrist in one of his favorite’s quotes said “Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time; you will not do anything with it.” How true is this statement?
There are a thousand and one reasons why ladies prefer to be seen and not heard. One of those reasons is a result of inferiority complex or what can be regarded as low self-esteem.
To understand the concept of self-esteem is to have a measure of one’s belief in one’s own ability. It is also known as being self-secure, which can guarantee a real measure of boldness, uplifted spirit and the mantle to storm any obstacle.
Often times on the University Campus, ladies get intimidated by others (those who may not be in a upper category with them), although they may not have the courage to conquer their fears, and feel down-casted wallowing in silent penury. Odd as it is, peripherals like dressing, the makeup, the body structure and a host of others affect the psychology of a woman. Low self-esteem could arise from intimidation by what is seen that others DO and HAVE better than them.
If every lady could come to the realization of the fact that there’s more to being a lady than the looks and all life has to offer, then they would be in a better position to overcome this obstacle.
Effects of Low self-esteem on women
-Low self-esteem limits exploration of one’s potential.
-Low self-esteem hampers the joy to enjoy life to the fullest because you are always shelled in.
-Low self-esteem leaves you at the bottom of the line, making people that are not as good as you go ahead in line. The last resort becomes the only choice for you.
CAUSES OF LOW SELF-ESTEEM
•Comparison: It will only make you think less of yourself. The fact that no two human beings have the same thumbprint is an absolute proof of each individual’s uniqueness.
Comparison breeds low self-esteem. “Comparison is the death of joy”, you are in no competition with anyone, give life your best with every shot you got. Leading a competitive life will lead to great unhappiness; you will always have someone better than your best.
•Looking at yourself with a societal mirror: The society can be so intimidating that even at your best you still feel bad. One thing you should never fail to understand is that the society will always have a varying standard of the ideal lady. Just like fashion, the standard gets outdated, quickly changed and replaced with another day in day out. This is why you should not try to always catch up with the societal trends; you may not live to tell the story. There have been looks celebrated in the society and changed with time. Don’t let the societally approved ideal lady mentality oppress you, it’s all facades.
The society will celebrate what you have to offer more than the looks they expect you to have. The only thing that matters is how you see and feel (impress) yourself. Nobody will approve you until you’re self-approved.
Solution to low self-esteem
•Have an edge over others. Find something you love doing, whatever it is, start doing it, the happiness and confidence from being productive is undisputable.
Always remember that the society will celebrate what you have to offer more than the looks they expect you to have.
•Love Yourself: Love every bit of yourself; people won’t appreciate you until you appreciate and love yourself. Embrace your imperfections as part of you. There could be something you wish you didn’t have or you wish you had, whichever way, embrace it as part of you. Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you as this is a golden rule. Thinking less of yourself will make people think less of you.
Bob Proctor said “Have a healthy respect for yourself not conceit”. Don’t be the kind of woman that will never pick herself if given the chance to pick.
Lisa Nichols an African-American female author said “Don’t expect people to show you your beauty, they’ll only show you their own definition of beauty.”
•Work on yourself: Change the flaws you have the control of changing. Try hard to look good as “Looking good is godly and good business”. Maintain your decency in looking good. Wear a thing that fit you and makes you comfortable; the confidence you get from looking good is inexplicable.
There are different perspectives to what beauty really is. Foremost, “Sweetness of attitude is true beauty”. Your attitude as a lady matters a lot. Do not mistake being classy for being sassy. Be elegance personified and polite. Always smile, it makes you charming and it is contagious.
•Get a grip of what your purpose is, write it out and work towards it. Inferiority complex is for people without a purpose.
Your greatness starts with you. Don’t allow yourself to be a slave to your inadequacies. Choose to be happy and get comfortable with yourself. A happy and confident woman begins and resides with you.