I like to think of myself as very observant – we all have our wishes – but while you can always rely on yours truly’s inquisitiveness, in this case it is a bit too obvious and you have to agree with me that some things some women do in public are a turn off if not outright appalling.
I am almost certain that you have at one time or too many a time looked at someone acting a fool in public and you wished that there was such a thing as public behaviour police and that you were part the force, so that you could catch up with them and teach them some manners – or give them a taste of the infamous police brutality seeing how much they deserved it.
These things seem obvious to most of us who understand that being in public means that it is not your personal space and that you need to consider other people, but if you are one of those people who need it to be spelt out to, I will do just that without fear or favour.
He is your boyfriend; we can see that – Get a room:
If you have come across a donkey on heat, you can very well relate to what I am about to portray here. Everything else stands still and it’s all about getting it on.
Some women let their men do anything to them wherever and whenever. Holding hands is cute, him holding you across the waist may be passionate, but his hand covering the better part of your sitting space in public and everyone else having to watch it move up and down as you walk is a tad too much.
It is equally bad for the man who is doing that but as the owner of the said property, come up with some terms and conditions, you are not a donkey, don’t make us refer to you with it’s other name!
Ignoring your child’s bad behavior:
If you are one of those women who let your kid run all over the house breaking everything and throwing shoes at you, that is okay – it’s your house.
When you bring that kid into the public, please put a leash on him because not everyone has the patience to put up with the behaviour that you are accommodating. If you are in a restaurant and your kid is busy stirring other people’s tea with his finger and all you can say is “daddy wacha”, behaviour police are about to catch up with you.
The ice queen:
If you are or have one of those girlfriends who sneer every time a guy says hi to them, you are on notice. Not everyone who says hi to you wants to get into your pants.
You might have spinach between your teeth and I was just being nice trying to get close to let you know without embarrassing you, so stop behaving like a snake that thinks everyone is out to get it and wants to strike first.
Furthermore, if a guy wants to get in your pants, it’s not like he is going to greet his way down the first time you respond to a greeting. We are social beings, act like one.
Picking a fight with your boyfriend or girlfriends in public:
No one cares what he did, its not like you reward him in public when he has been really good; do not pick a fight in public. All those women who do this need to know that people do not gather around to watch how much of a Laila Ali you are but rather to see you make a fool of yourself and then later see you together with the guy after you have patched things up.
Fighting your girlfriend in public and pulling each other’s weaves out in public is not cool either. Its not like someone will wait until the fight is over and walk up to you to find out where you have your hair done, because the weave stood the test of a catfight.
Being intoxicated in broad daylight:
If you are one of those party animals, please leave the club before daybreak. There is nothing as devastating as seeing a beautiful or once beautiful woman staggering around on the street or passed out in a matatu. Even if it is on a Monday, Have the decency to do your staggering in the dark.
Talking about someone in your company:
The ice and drama queens have these tendencies of going out with a girlfriend you very well know you do not like, and then spend the entire time talking about her and using such phrases as “some people” or “some of us”. If you do not like her, just don’t go out with her in the first place, it is only a matter of time before you are on the other side of the talk.
Being too loud on the phone:
Old folks can scream as much as they want on the phone, after all, the phones came after their time and their hearing may not be as good. Why do you; a self proclaimed beautiful young lady want to involve everyone in your business?
If you are one of those people who go shouting around about how much fun you had at the spa or how a certain girlfriend who has crossed you is going to get it, please know now that no one gives a rat’s behind about your private and life and keep it that way – private. If you have been doing one or more of these things in public, you need to stop now, and then you can thank me later.
Rocking heels that you cannot walk in:
Have you ever walked behind a woman enjoying her gully creeper dance? Some women can put on shoes with the longest heels you can find and still do the cat-walk like the street is their runway and the spotlight is on them – that is good for them, but if you are going to put on high heels and walk like a camel on tarmac, please don’t bother. With a walking style like you are a hazard to yourself and the people around you, just like a building without a good foundation.
The bushy armpits:
We all love a woman with long hair – on her head. Whatever you do, do not wear a vest or sleeveless top without shaving your armpits or without a bra underneath.
You may have come across a woman looking all good until she lifts her hands up and made you think that she brought her pet with her.
Some of them do not even have to lift their hands up – they look like they have Osama bin Laden peeping out of their armpits. It is not only unsanitary but disgusting when it starts to drip, get rid of it!
Walking around with unkempt hair:
The next time you are seated somewhere and someone’s kid pulls your hair, don’t blame the kid. He probably thought it was a wet cat sitting on your head. There is no excuse whatsoever for being in public with your hair looking like you just got electrocuted and somehow survived the ordeal – even if you are on your way to the salon.
There’s plenty of ways you can cover your hair and still look great. I know some women who’ve been having a bad hair year and they always look like they’ve just woken up to bad news. Secondly, if you cannot afford good quality weaves, leave the sisal alone for heaven’s sake. Some weave colours look like the manufacturers were conducting a survey, to find out if anyone would actually buy them.
A woman is supposed to be glorious in the way she looks, the way she acts, walks and relates to other people. In fact, I think that it is the woman that was created in God’s image, but some women do things in public that make you want to call it a day and go back home to sleep.
There is a reason why we open doors for you, pull chairs and treat you with respect, because a woman should command respect not only because of the title but by the way she carries herself. If you are one of those women who have been doing one or more of these things in public, you need to stop now, and then you can thank me later.