Anonymous asked June 8, 2016

I like this forum and I hope I can make it a companion. Please help me. I am a young girl who is all alone in a big city. My mother died when I was young and my father’s other wives started punishing me so when I finish my secondary school, I came to Lagos to stay with my mummy’s cousin. She sent me to Poly after I helped her in her shop for a year, but , two times her husband raped and told me he will kill me if I say anything. So, I kept the secret and started running from him, I make sure that I don’t go to the house when he is alone. Anyway, now I have gone back to work for my auntie after my school, and I met a guy that I’m going out with. He is a nice guy, but he is a womanizer and he beats me sometimes. He said he wants to marry me, but my friends say I should not marry him because he can kill me. When I told him that my uncle raped me he beats me so much and said it was my fault. What can I do now? I just want to marry and leave that house. Please advise me.
Rashida

7 answers

Anonymous July 30, 2016

Because you are in a hurry to the leave the house does not mean you should over look the beatings you get from your boyfriend. firstly, getting married cannot heal you. You need to find happiness in yourself because you will become more frustrated after getting married to him. May be you should stay out of relationship now till you are confident
Secondly, let go of the pains, pray to God and forgive the man that raped you. It could be very difficult but it is important so you can live the rest of your life in peace.
Thirdly, you are not all alone. If there is no family you can put up with, look out for a motherless home you can volunteer with or a church and get a job so you can earn a bit. You have to stand up and make up your mind because you will be a mother to great children and you would not want to pass on the bitterness to them.
I hope this helps.
God bless you.

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