4 common mistakes of spouses in crisis that you can avoid
1. Insist on the same argument
If you’re in a hole, all you do not have to do is keep digging. If what you have done has not worked, what is the reason for insisting on it? You talk, no use, so you scream the same thing … It will not work. Under pressure we tend to repeat failed actions, you need to bar this as soon as possible. Improve your arguments, look for different ways of dealing with what is happening.
2. Entering the egos war
Your partner does something you do not like and you retaliate. To dispute who can hurt the most is to feed a vicious circle that, at some point, will provoke a fatal break. Have you ever watched ” The War of the Roses “? I like to point out this film because it is necessary to realize how much ego can put us in vexatious situations and great suffering.
3. Act inflexibly
If we do not seek to understand things from another’s perspective we become inflexible and stubborn. We simply close ourselves to any kind of understanding. In the face of a crisis the most sensible thing is to “put on the shoes of the other”, that is, to try to understand what moves the partner, what his reasons, his fears, his point of view. Empathy is critical to healthy and lasting relationships.
4. Justify your own mistakes
It is not enough to acknowledge their responsibility in the conflict; One must apologize clearly and not fall back on the action. You see, it’s not about justifying the behaviors you regret, but about really asking for forgiveness for them. So do not consider your spouse’s actions to justify your mistakes. Remember that this is an apology and not a new charge.